T'other day, I was running through my SR lines in my head by way of entertainment and also curiosity to see whether I could still remember them.

I got all the way through a favourite speech "I know. I know you love me. God knows you say it often enough. I don't say that to be cruel. But I never hear the words without sensing something's being asked of me. The words drain me. From your lips, they've become a kind of blackmail. They mean 'I love you and so...' So I am entitled to be endlessly comforted and supported and cheered...." and on and on it went. But I trotted through it amiably enough, interestingly, a month on.

But then I stuck. I got to the start of the Fight. "Good", I say, "then you have what you want". "No", say he, "I want you". I: "Why, why, for god's sake, if I'm what you say I am, if I'm what, (insert adjective)" But I could not remember the word. I got the next line: "If I'm what then, possessive, if I'm this terrible influence, then plainly you're better off free of me." But the previous adjective? Puzzled and puzzled and could not remember. So I shamefacedly capitulated and consulted The Orange Book.

Patronising.

Fitting.